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Comments for 'An Endless War' |
Dispraiser - Forced into MADNESS by crappy fanfics
3:47 am | March 25, 2003
I am pissed off! I see almsot nothing specail in this one and I see probably hundreds of typoes! Email it to me and i will spell check it for ou, or beter yet, try sounding the words out. The last time I heard a light himmm or someone be rufless... Well.... Yeah... Seems like you also have no defined writing style. Sometimes you have some weird kind, which is actually somewhat ok, the one where you talk like it is 3rd person, "The lights [humm] on.". A little work there and it could be nice. The other times it is borderline first person and a little bit worse because you don't seem to get first person very well...
First person views for the main Character...
I, me, my, ect. Like YOU are the person.
Third person views for the Main Character (or anyone else for tha matter)
He, she, his, her, ect.
D+!!!
+when writing stle is defined it is actually ok...
-Proper grammar (paragraphs)
-Undefined writing style
-unoriginal
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monitor101
11:01 pm | March 24, 2003
Pretty good Mills don't overdue the word usage.
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Steele
1:14 am | March 24, 2003
Use Spell Check. IT works wonders.
Start a new paragraph every time a different character speaks.
Provided by Steele's school of grammatically correct writing and journalism.
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Sarge
10:00 pm | March 23, 2003
Okay a bit on the short side but that's okay there are lots of typos and you said the word Sarg probably 20000 times!!!
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