Halo Song Parodies
Posted By: reagan64<floggermig23@hotmail..com>
Date: 30 January 2005, 5:28 PM
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"Grunts of the Covenant"
Last day of my Grunty life
I wish I would've known
Cause I didn't kiss my food nipple goodbye
I didn't tell it that I loved it and how much I care
Or thank Yayap for all the talks
And all the wisdom he shared
Unaware, I just did what I always do
Everyday the same routine
When I get outta the tank
But who knew knew this day wasn't like the rest
Instead of sneaking a rest
I took two to the chest
Call me blind but I didn't see it coming
Even the Hunters were runnin'
But I couldn''t hear nthin' except
Gun blasts, it happened so fast
I don't really this devil
Or his M-A-5
Maybe it was somthing that my leaders done
Or maybe for a moment it was something I was
Or maybe this Spartan just wanted to be hugged
Whatever it was
I know it's because
We are, We are, the Grunts of the Coveanant
We are, We are, Grunts of the Covenant
Little Linglin was just cannon fodder
Given nothing to hope, from that 'Zamamee
All he got was the fate
Worse than ole' Rolamee
Ambushed, we were that day
Just fodder for his Mjolnir
Panicked and shot a Hunter
Minutes later his body in the gutter
Gagaw always played the fool
Just wanted to escape the terrible rule
The Prophets have decreed
And now there's no escape
For the plasma's deed
That Human was just a rat
Blew up Halo with him only holding a gat
We are, We are, the Grunts of the Covenant
We are, We are, Grunts of the Covenant
Who's to blame for the Grunty lives
These tragedies claim?
Nothing that the Prophets say can take away the pain
That I, feel inside
I'm tired of all the lies
That's just the way that the story goes
Will it ever make sense, or is that
How we'll all go?
At least those that gone
Can look foreward too
Paradise of Methane
For all of us that have came
We are, We are, the Grunts of the Covenant
We are, We are, the Grunts of the Covenant
We are, We are, the Elites' fodder
We are, We are, the Elites' fodder
We are, We are, the Grunts of the Covenant
We are, We are, Grunts of the Cove-nant!
"The Wreck Of the Sacred Promise"
The legend lives from Fore-runner on down
Of the big black they Alpha-Halo
Vacuum it is said, never gives up her dead
When the Pillar of Autumnn comes early
With Covenant hardcore twenty-six thousand tons more
Than the Sa-acred Promise weighed empty
That good ship and crew was a devil to chew
When the Pillar of Autumn came early
The ship was the pride of the Covenant side
Coming back from a battle at Reach
As the big cruisers go it was bigger than most
With a crew and Ship Master well seasoned
Concluding some terms with a couple of A-birms
When they left fully loaded for Ha-lo
And later that night when the ship's screen rang
Could it be the MAC rounds they'd been fearin'?
The winds of the sun made a tattle-tale sound
As an Archer broke over her armor
And every Grunt knew as the Ship Master did too
T'was the Pillar of Autumn come roarin'
The dawn came late and the Food Nipples had too wait
When the Pillar of Autumn came steamin'
When afternoon came it was Metal rain
In the face of a hurricane solar wind
When suppertime came the Grunty cook came on deck sayin'
Fellas, its too rough to drink ya
At seven pm the main fuel cells caved in, he said
Fellas, the Prophets be with ya!
The Ma-ster wired in he had coolant comin' in
And the purp ship and crew as in peril
And later that night with the plasma outta sight
Came the wreck of the Sa-acred Promise
Does anyone know where the love of Truth goes
When the rounds turn the units to cycles
The searches all say they'd of made Halo's bay
Had they put fifteen more AUs behind her
They might have split up by the MAC rounds
May broke down deep in cool-ant
And all that remains are the faces and the names
Of the Grunts and the Hunters, Elites
Hal-lo below, Threshold sings
In the rooms of the Floo-d hellhole
Old Autumn steams like a Ship Master's dreams
The Rings and the Truth are for Prophets
And farther below Alpha Ha-lo
Takes in what the old girl couldn't take her
And the Cruisers all go as the Prophets well know
With the Pillar of Autumn remembered
In the purp-halls of High Charity
In the Sanctrum of the Hier-archs
And the Arbitors groanded twenty-nine and ten times
For each E-lite on the Sa-acred Promise
The legend lives on from the Fore-runner on down
Of the big black they call Apha-Halo
Vacuum it is said, never gives up her dead
When the Pillar of Autumn comes early.
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