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Comments for 'Endurance: One Way In,No Way Out' |
Silent Hunter
7:57 pm | July 11, 2004
Ya ya ya...I need to boost up the stories, I was typing this stories to find an idea. Yes this story sucks nuts, next story should work. Its going to have a major battle on a coast on Earth. I did proof read, it must be something then. The major battle is my idea not from any other, so dont go all hard on me.
The Silent Assassins Clan -={XiX}=-
www.freewebs.com/rainbow_xix/
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Dave Luck
7:35 pm | July 8, 2004
I will, don't worry. I will read and comment as usual, but Cold Blooded, you probably don't want too many comments from me. Most of them are negative, I'm sad to say. But if your stories are good, I will show my good side. Oh, and read the funny below.
This section of Halo was brought to you by:
******Doctor Scholl's Toothpaste!*******
Because n00bs these days like to put their foot where their mouth is.
- Dave Luck
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CoLd BlooDed
5:29 pm | July 7, 2004
Actually, I've talked to him on IRC. He just doesn't care about fan fiction anymore because half the people who are now submitting their writing butchered it.
Say, Dave Luck, I like how you rate peoples stories. Do you think you can give mine a glance?
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Dave Luck
3:48 pm | July 7, 2004
*Sigh* Grammar.
After being able to get back to the real fiction that I was used to, ranging from the classics like 'Lord of the Flies' and 'To Kill a Mockingbird,' to thrillers such as Robert Ludlum's 'Hades Factor' and Tom Clancy's 'The Kremlin,' I am now ready to go all out on n00bs.
The sloppy fanfiction of this section has made me soft on n00bs. But no longer. I will strike back with the power of Robert Ludlum and Tom Clancy!! All will fall before our might!
Here goes the first of many....
Okay, so what? You put a fanfic on Bungie. Oh, so I take it you expect your name to be in lights, Right?
WRONG.
The whole thing is pathetic. Not pathos, meaning sad or despairing, but pathetic. Really pathetic. I can't even get what you're saying half the time, because everything is so jumbled up.
Another thing.
- The story is flat and lifeless. Everything is stagnant and flaccid. Why? Because of repeated simple sentences, repetition, and because there's no effort to format.
There's no capitalization, and proper punctuation is missing. What the hell are you doing?
I wouldn't even call this writing! Kinder-garteners write neater than this! (Or at least I did!)
If these comments sound harsh, well, that's because this worthless peice of junk deserved it.
WHY CAN'T YOU READ THE GUIDELINES?!?!?
Save on the Bandwidth and disk space, Wu, I see a great opportunity to save on resources.
- Dave.
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Helljumper
2:53 am | July 6, 2004
Can't read it till you use the code, but from wat i say, you need to proof read
ODST
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