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Comments for 'Beckoning to Doom: Prologue' |
Nick Kang
12:56 am | April 13, 2004
Yeah I kinda messed up with the descriprions...didn't put enough work into the Marines' point of view.
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CoLd BlooDed
6:59 pm | April 12, 2004
It was okay, the format seemed weird along with some descriptions. Still good though.
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Grey fox
9:57 pm | April 11, 2004
Yeah Nicks got a point there. Anyway, I think that this story will get real interesting, not like it already hasn't. Cant wait for the next one. (;p
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Nick Kang
10:10 am | April 11, 2004
I made the Ship Master guy say:
"You will be fighting your own kind!"
so I did warn the crew about the Covies boarding the ship.
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Helljumper
10:17 pm | April 10, 2004
Because you are using Helljumpers, i'll be watching your series closely, don't disappoint me.
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Helljumper
10:15 pm | April 10, 2004
well your main character is an ODST so you know that makes me happy. The story was good, short, but good. you need more details so that we care about the characters. If i was a Covenant commander and my ship was being boarded by other Covenant, i would tell my crew that we are being boarded by Covenant so that they don't just open the doors and say welcome.
ODST
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Ishkabibbl
10:05 pm | April 10, 2004
It was decent.
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Wiley
9:29 pm | April 10, 2004
Oh, i think you should have it closer,a hundred meters is pretty high up for a Grav lift, and the grav lift in T&R is only like 30 meters off of the ground....just a little detail...and...yea...
Also, it would be cool if the renegade Covanent teamed up with the ODSTs and destroyed the Cleanser. But it's your story...ahh...who cares, itll be good nonetheless.
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Nick Kang
8:58 pm | April 10, 2004
It's hovering about a hundred meters off the ground.
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Wiley
7:55 pm | April 10, 2004
Very good. Just clear one thing up: is the Covanent ship in space or on the ground?
9.7/10
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CoLd BLooDed
3:38 pm | April 10, 2004
I don't have time to read this 'cause I'm going to my dads, I'll be sure to read it on Sunday or Monday. :)
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The Author
1:37 pm | April 10, 2004
Anyone gonna respond...?
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