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Comments for 'War Is Hell: Chapter 1: Getting Across' |
Burny
9:52 am | April 29, 2004
Alright, holy crap. Holy crap...*tries to think of a reply*...okay, so basically my story is good and all but I just get alot of references wrong?
Jin1, I'm not describing my characters because I want the reader (you) to paint your own picture. It's sort of like how Bungie won't tell us what the Master Chief looks like.
Slayer Boi, if I didn't explai nclear enough, there were two Grunts...one per turrent. Not two. And the Covenant took the airfield so the Marines wouldn't be able to use it anymore...it's not like they have Banshees or dropships there. Just a bunch of Wraiths, Ghosts, Shadows, and Shades.
~Burny~
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Mainevent
12:00 am | April 29, 2004
Besides, Brutes are tougher and have those grenade launchers.
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System Failure
10:03 pm | April 28, 2004
I think it was a nice story. I think the Brutes are kinda like a special security service. If a lot of power with not a lot of soldiers is needed, they will be there. That way not only does 300 Elites gaurding the prophet in a big area makes sense, but also does 5-6 Brutes guarding a small close quarters temple.
-SYSTEM-
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Mainevent
7:17 pm | April 28, 2004
I believe that the Brutes guarded the shrine/palace, not the prophet itself. They may have, but I don't have it on me at the moment. And what's to say that Brutes are only holy guards? That's like saying that only strong men are football players. It's common, but not sure.
The battle rifle rounds is probably just an estimate.
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Nick Kang
9:23 pm | April 27, 2004
To MCC: 1. I don't think Brutes are the holy body guard dudes...in H:FS, it says 300 Elites guarded that Prophet guy, so I think if Brutes were the holy guards, there would be 300 BRUTES guarding the Prophet.(Of course, I may be wrong, cause I can't find my FS book at the moment.
2. As for the Banshees at an airfield comment, in the prologue, there are are Banshees that attack the Human amphibian insertion boats.
As for the story, it was pretty good. I don't think it was as good as the prologue, but still worth the read. Keep it up.
9.3/10
NK
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MC's Cousin
8:51 pm | April 27, 2004
Man, I know I really hit the nail on the head when every other comment makes mention to my name. Damn my big mouth I guess...
Signing Off
MCC
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Helljumper
3:27 pm | April 27, 2004
damn MCC u said it all
ODST
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Slayer Boi
2:24 am | April 27, 2004
I really enjoyed it, but agree with MCC's points. Also y would there be 2 grunts manning each turret? last time i checked only one grunt per turret. Also, if the marines were trying to take control of an important covenant air field you would, naturally, expect that there would be Banshee's there. Also don't covenant ships(i.e. Banshee's Drop Ships) Get Deployed from Battle cruisers or whatever they are called. Thus why would they have an airfield? Other than that it was good -SB
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Jin1
9:21 pm | April 26, 2004
That story was awesome, MCC has some has some good points. BTW you should describe what the Marines look like. Not just give them names.
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MC's Cousin
1:48 pm | April 26, 2004
Congradulations! Your story warrented me taking notes on to remmber what to tell you about.
First- "1000+" is not how to put that in a story. Write it like: "over 1000" or I think this looks better: "over one-thousand".
Second- That Elite's name was off. If you read the Halo books, you will see you got it wrong. It was almost right though. Switch those names around and you'll have a just-dandy name.
Third- Brute body guards? I faintly remember reading about that kind of thing in a story when I first appeared here. I don't think it is realistic. I'm thinking that Brutes don't guard Elites. Or vice-versa. Brutes are the holy guard dudes. Read Halo: First Strike (again, if you have already) and you will see what I mean. Guarding an Elite's sorry ass is not something I think Brutes would do (no offense to any of us Elite Halo players).
Fourth- "...neon eyes..." No. Sorry, but no. Elites don't have glowing eyes or anything. Look at them in the game and books. I mean, sure you could refer to them as that but...find a beter metaphore.
Fifth- "...what the hell..." No. You are putting human words into an Elite's mouth. They don't speak like that. Make them sound like Covenant, not humans. Although it was kinda funny, but it was incorrectly placed in the story, it screwed with the mood. If you want to find how Elite's think, read (er...re-read) Halo: The Flood.
Sixth- I actually liked you "Covenant landmine" reference. I would like to see some of those in stories, and the game. But next time you use them, describe it more. And they don't produce shrapnel, just watch a plasma grenade. Just plasma.
Seventh and Finally- Be careful with the Battle Rifle and its rounds (30). It sounds right, but I'm not sure where you're getting that from. Inform me (darn my memory).
Sorry for this huge-ass comment, but it was needed.
Signing Off
MCC
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