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Comments for 'The Defense of Earth 2: The 889th Tactical Fighter Wing' |
Steele
12:17 pm | March 26, 2003
And to add to my last comment. Eventually the MAC round would lose all it's kinetic energy, even though it would keep going. Then it would be so much junk, floating around.
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Steele
12:51 pm | March 25, 2003
I know the laws of Gravity but in the Fall of Reach at one point the Super MAC rounds fall short because of the Covenant being out of range.
If the MACs were in deep space with no planets around then they could go pretty far. But in system you must account for the pull of the sun and stuff!
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Dispraiser
3:42 am | March 25, 2003
Nothing can go on forever, particularly in an atmosphere. The friction would slow it and heat it. Extra damage I suppose, but only to the point that it breaks up...
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GOD
7:00 am | March 24, 2003
What i dont like about this story is that the MAC rounds fall short. there is no friction in space and thus the MAC rounds would not slow down and "fall short". the MAC rounds would continue on their course indefinently. you might want to say the covenants moved out of the MACs way.
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Steele
1:03 am | March 24, 2003
Yes, indeed I have read all the X-Wing books. There are some of my favorite and inspired my story.
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Some random guy
11:48 pm | March 23, 2003
Is it just me, or have you read the Star Wars: X-wing series?
Some of the terms used in your series are from there, but then again, they could be from anywhere.
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Steele
6:08 pm | March 23, 2003
Well, I wasn't really meaning to appease the stupid. I just know what it feels like to open a story and watch my scroll bar shrink at an alarming rate. I look over at the story and see line after line of microscopic writing, w/o a return. Trying to read that ususally results in an itching sensation deep within my pupil.
As for originality...that's kinda hard to do. Nearly everything has been done.
I mean, what drew me to Halo was the Military SF. I could leave the military viewpoint and do other stuff (an ambitious politican trying for world domination, while Earth is under attack by the Covenant).
Well anyway, I'll try to 'strengthen' my dialouge and throw in a plot twist or two. Maybe another Alien species totally unaware of the other two, but extremely hostile.
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TM
4:27 pm | March 23, 2003
*to
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Traumatised Marine
4:21 pm | March 23, 2003
It's not fair, Dispraiser's said it all, now I sound like a parrot!
Well, I'm not sure if you did actually shorten it to 'appease the retards' or if you didn't feel like writing as much as last time. But if it was the first reason, then please don't. Artists don't paint what people want to see (or at least good ones don't... unless they're illustrators...)
and you shouldn't have to change your writing for those who you think will be reading it.
Plot twists WOULD be good, but then maybe you already had that planned.
It is nice too read fiction which doesn't have bloated numbers of Covenant being defeated by a few Marines, it's so easy to write, yet so crap to imagine.
The last line was... humourous
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DIspraiser
8:17 pm | March 22, 2003
I believe that in your last part you commented on it's length claiming that ou would lower it... I complained about that. Your fanfic will pay for appeasing to the retards who don't read more than a full screen. In any case, there is some dialogue in this that is fairly weak, the characters seeming a little generic, though in the end that is a very small thing, a detail. The story is good enough, though somewhat unoriginal. That's my big thing today... I have never seen anyone write a fanfic like this before, but it is soley because of the circumstances. Mo doubt that someone has written a fanfic about a fighter wing on another planet... Maybe some... AHEM... Plot twists with... AHEM... Earth and Halo 2... Cou-flood-gh...
B+ Series, just shy of exellant this time, but nothing to really trash it for besides that you appeased the stupid...
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